Arch Idiot
The caped mastermind. Gold shield exactly where a hero's letter would go, one eyebrow permanently up. Announces the plan, starts the plan, forgets the plan.
“Villainy this competent defeats itself.”
ARCH IDIOT
Even the villains here are idiots. $ARCHI
“My scheme is flawless. Step one: take over the city. Step two… Lugnut, what was step two?”
The Scheme Diary
Property of Arch Idiot. Do not read. (Lugnut, stop reading.)
- Entry 1. Stole the moon. Flawless execution. Moon is still up there. Investigating.FAILED
- Entry 2. Built a doomsday laser. Lugnut brought a flashlight. Blinded myself. Masterstroke.FAILED
- Entry 3. Wrote the plan down so I cannot forget it. Cannot find where I wrote it down.FAILED
- Entry 4. Behold: a giant magnet to pull the city to my lair. Pulled my own belt buckle. Lugnut narrated the whole thing.FAILED
- Entry 5. Practised the evil laugh for three hours. Got the hiccups. Tomorrow: the same plan, done perfectly.PENDING
P.S. the napkin had the whole plan on it.
The cast of the lair
Lackey Lugnut
Henchman. Dented hardhat. Hands over the wrong gadget at the worst possible moment, then narrates the disaster out loud, in full, for the record.
“He's pointing the banana at the city now.”
Lugnut's Gadget Drawer
Ask Lugnut for the gadget the scheme needs. He will hand you something.
The drawer is shut. Pick a gadget.
The lair fridge
Tap the fridge to slap a sticker on it. Arch Idiot calls this “redecorating the headquarters”.
Public notice mastermind sighted, threat level: forgetful